Click here for Part I! Childhood. That blissful time when you could do whatever you wanted without scrutiny. You could run and play to your heart’s content free from the burden of responsibility. But do you know how strange some of your childhood pastimes were? Your parents smiled at behavior that would make other people scratch their heads in bewilderment. Here is a list of four weird things you did as a kid. Feel free to leave others in the comments section below.
4. Put everything in your mouth
Wow! Look at this rock! It has dirt and shiny specks all over it. It could be a diamond! It could be worth millions! Might as well put it in my mouth. Sound familiar? Kids love to put things in their mouths. Be it a stick on the playground or mommy’s necklace, everything has to be eaten. As bright as children are, they tend to follow a general rule: if it looks at least somewhat edible, it must be consumed. Glue? Check. Money? Check. Cat hair? Why not? This habit, of course, leads to many tummy-aches and owies. Why did we insist on eating everything in sight? If only we could remember…
3. Hide under the bed
Every kid dreads some part of the week—maybe it’s bath time or a music lesson, or perhaps going to visit Grandma and Grandpa so they can pinch your cheek and tell you why everything was so much better in the 1930s (“You call this a recession? Let me tell you…”). Even so, why did under the bed seem like such a good place to hide? Possibly the only hiding spot never to work, this dusty location was the first place a parent or babysitter would come to find you. A poorly placed hand or foot could compromise your location, and the dog or cat would inevitably come find you and blow your cover. Worst of all, your parents or babysitter would be annoyed with you for “trying to make everyone late.” It would have made much more sense to hide in the closet or behind the curtains.
2. Pretend you were a zombie
Remember how much fun it was to pretend you were a zombie? Playground games often involved stumbling around trying to catch unwary humans. Chances are you or a friend dressed up as a zombie for Halloween. But do kids ever consider how horrible these imaginary worlds would actually be? Beneath the laughter lies an apocalyptic hellscape where rotting carcasses tear flesh from people’s bones. They rip people apart, feeding on them like a frenzied mob. Sounds fun, right? Somebody needs to show kids an episode of The Walking Dead…
1. Hate bath time
While taking a bath is clearly not as much fun as running around the house or playing outside, why did the tub spur so much hatred? A bath never took more than fifteen minutes, and afterward you smelled like nice shampoo. Even though the no-tears soap and shampoo would sting your eyes (courtesy of those lying bastards and Johnson & Johnson), this could not have inspired the full-blown havoc imposed by the faucet. Maybe it had taken days of hard work to become that dirty and the bath was ruining it. Perhaps it just wasn’t any fun. We may never know the root of this hatred.
So what do you think? Did you do any of these as a kid? Or am I just really weird? Let me know in the comments section below! As always, please like, share, or reblog this post if you enjoy it. Be sure to check me out on Twitter and Facebook as well. Thanks for reading! Don’t forget to subscribe for new content every Wednesday! Now go check out Part I!
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Comment question of the week
What’s the weirdest thing you did as a kid? Do your kids do anything like this?